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Memoir of the Loser - Day 1134

 Memoir of the Loser - Day 1134 Yo. Another hot and sunny day passed. I finally opened my laptop after almost 2 weeks. Coincidentally, its been exactly 7 years since I bought it. Its on its last legs and begging me to retire it but I don't have any other option... I wish I could buy a new laptop but I can't. I wasted my time using my mobile . See, I can't work efficiently if I am not in my room and I can't sit in my room because there is only one ac in our home and that's not in my room. I did try my best to work as much as possible. I tried fixing an old song. But every time I export it, I hear pops and crackles. I don't hear anything during the playback in the daw itself. Anyway, I took a nap during the day. Because last night I couldn't sleep properly once again because of my mom snoring. I got my bike fixed and it feels weird lol. Also I got some weird red spots on my face... It was sun burn I think. They disappeared after a while when I wasn't in th...
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Memoir of the Loser - Day 399

 Memoir of the Loser - Day 399

Hey, another miserable day passed. High temperature, hot wind. It was extremely bad. So bad that i want to die... Well, nothing unusual. My eyes hurt. They are so dry and my skin as well looks like its about to give up and break. And its not going to rain until next month. Yep, its going to be hard to even survive.  

 Also, tomorrow... Finally i will have to fill out the form for BCA. I am doing it through correspondence. Only because its the cheapest option. Honestly, i don't want to study at all. Its not for me, i know. But i also know that i am extremely unlucky. I don't know what my fate has in store for me. But I can't follow my passion because I haven't seen any results until now. So, I don't have any option but to do what mom says.  

 The only i am alive is because of her. She is only person and reason I am alive. Because I don't want to hurt her. But I wonder for how long I can do it. Its too hard. I could keep following my passion and do what I want but I want to see her happy. And the only thing that can make her happy is if I go to college.   

Also, a kid comes for tuition to my sister. And he is quite a mischievious kid. Few days ago, he got beaten by a middle aged man because his friend would press their home's doorbell and run away. Only he got caught, lol. Now, he doesn't even study and his mom and aunt gave him a long lecture on how his parents are trying their best to send him to good school and he is just time and money. But i know that he Doesn't give a damn. And that he is going to regret it in future when everyone else will move ahead of him. See ya:(

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