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Memoir of the Loser - Day 1281

Memoir of the Loser - Day 1281   Yo. Another day passed. It was not an usual day. I ate a looot of oily food today. I guess it's alright since I didn't eat anything during the day and I observed fast on past two days. I worked on my music like every day. My mom and sister went to the temple early in morning but I went later . Still, I had to wake up around one and half hour earlier than my usual time. Its quite cold in the morning. I understand why people have already started wearing jackets and hoodies. But during the day, it can get very warm. My sister had terrible headache through out the day. It could be because of multiple reasons. She woke up early, couldn't take a nap or maybe because she went to the city yesterday and had to navigate through extreme traffic. But I took a long and great nap during the day. I also took some iq tests at night. I have been very curious about my iq. Even though I don't trust them completely, they can give me a rough estimate. The we...
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Memoir of the Loser - Day 399

 Memoir of the Loser - Day 399

Hey, another miserable day passed. High temperature, hot wind. It was extremely bad. So bad that i want to die... Well, nothing unusual. My eyes hurt. They are so dry and my skin as well looks like its about to give up and break. And its not going to rain until next month. Yep, its going to be hard to even survive.  

 Also, tomorrow... Finally i will have to fill out the form for BCA. I am doing it through correspondence. Only because its the cheapest option. Honestly, i don't want to study at all. Its not for me, i know. But i also know that i am extremely unlucky. I don't know what my fate has in store for me. But I can't follow my passion because I haven't seen any results until now. So, I don't have any option but to do what mom says.  

 The only i am alive is because of her. She is only person and reason I am alive. Because I don't want to hurt her. But I wonder for how long I can do it. Its too hard. I could keep following my passion and do what I want but I want to see her happy. And the only thing that can make her happy is if I go to college.   

Also, a kid comes for tuition to my sister. And he is quite a mischievious kid. Few days ago, he got beaten by a middle aged man because his friend would press their home's doorbell and run away. Only he got caught, lol. Now, he doesn't even study and his mom and aunt gave him a long lecture on how his parents are trying their best to send him to good school and he is just time and money. But i know that he Doesn't give a damn. And that he is going to regret it in future when everyone else will move ahead of him. See ya:(

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